APPROACHES
Life is a dreadful
disappointment if you don’t
keep your appointments
RECREATION
Drops of sun melt
and descend like fiery dew:
I relax in water
REFUSAL
I wait in a queue
stare at her questioningly
She says, No thank you
MISCALCULATIONS
The needle goes in the
errant slot, fumbles: the thread of
time breaks and rolls away
FUTURE
The dim light shining
bizarrely over the car
about to be stolen
ODDITY
The red wall with the
gaping void in the centre,
and light shining through
Life is a dreadful
disappointment if you don’t
keep your appointments
RECREATION
Drops of sun melt
and descend like fiery dew:
I relax in water
REFUSAL
I wait in a queue
stare at her questioningly
She says, No thank you
MISCALCULATIONS
The needle goes in the
errant slot, fumbles: the thread of
time breaks and rolls away
FUTURE
The dim light shining
bizarrely over the car
about to be stolen
ODDITY
The red wall with the
gaping void in the centre,
and light shining through
Comments
Mind you, I do like to see haikus keeping strictly to the 5,7,5 syllable rule.
What do you think?
good whatever.
Enjoyable...especialy the MISCALCULATIONS.
'a book I read on Haiku recently said that was because 'the Japanese language lent it's self naturally to 17 syllables, naturally, rhythmically and historically. Hense other haiku writers see the 17 syllable pattern as an irrelavent phenomenon.' which means I think that you can egnore it if you like. Another problem is it can depend on how you pronounce thngs. Me I don't always count them correctly. oops!